Welcome to the tantalizing world of edging—the art of almost cumming, over and over again, until your brain forgets your own name. Edging is all about teasing, denial and control. Whether you're flying solo, topping a hottie, or navigating switchy waters with a partner, this type of sex is all about riding the wave without crashing the orgasmic boat.
So how do you dive into edging like the thirsty little menace you are? Here's your guide, featuring toys from our Best Sex Toys for Edging collection—because edging without the right tools is like trying to bake a cake with no heat: sad ,squishy and most importantly not hard.
What Is Edging?
Edging means getting right to the brink of orgasm, then stopping or slowing stimulation, preventing or pausing an orgasm. Edging builds intensity, heightens sensitivity, and can result in stronger, brain-melting orgasms (or none if you're into denial, you diabolical fiend).
You can edge for minutes, hours or even days! Check out our chastity collection if you really wanna drive yourself or your lover nuts by not being able to nut.
Can Edging Be Queer?
Some folks might believe edging is something straight people do or only for folks with penises and that’s just not true! Edging can extend and enhance pleasure without needing penetration. It can be done to any/all genitals. It requires communication from everyone involved, and we all know queers love communication. To be edged also requires being aware of your body and your limits. By practicing edging solo or with partners, it allows you to know your body and sexuality on an even deeper level. Edging also lets us deconstruct sex and refocus on simply providing pleasure for the other and enjoy the journey, not the destination. Plus, edging adds in power dynamics, sensory play and a very fun level of flirtation and teasing in the bedroom, all of which all inherently queer IMO!
So How Do I Ruin My Life By Edging?
There’s many ways to pause and prevent an orgasm once play has started, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. It’s important to set the scene first!
Get Turned On!
First, get aroused! Kiss, make out, enjoy each other’s bodies! Adding a blindfold, mask or restraints can elevate the scene. Not being able to see or move adds anticipation, enhances the power play aspect and removes the ability for someone to jerk themselves off, putting all their pleasure into your hands!
Use Your Words!
It’s important to let your partner know where you’re at during the process! If something feels good, let them know! If you’re close, let your partner know damn it! If you’re the one denying your lover, ask questions to prompt them to let you know where they’re at. Here’s some suggestions for you perverts:
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"Tell me when you're close. I'll decide what happens next."
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“You're not allowed to cum until I say so."
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“I want to hear how desperate you are to cum."
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“Is poor baby hard? Does my whimpering slut was to come? Too bad bitch!”
Okay, you get the idea. Add your own flair to it.
Now Slow The Fuck Down!
When you feel yourself or your lover approaching orgasm, stop or slow down! However, you don’t have to wait until the moment right before orgasm happens to switch things up, as the closer you get, the closer you risk coming accidentally. There’s many ways to ruin an orgasm. Take your hands or toys off whoever is being pleasured. You can stop or switch up the pattern in which you’re rubbing whoever is being edged. Changing up the sensations or adding in an element of surprise can also pause an orgasm. Here are some suggestions:
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Pause stroking or touching and slap your partner (consensually ofc).
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Suddenly incorporate a cold sensation in play, such as an ice cube.
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Instead of rubbing hard and fast during foreplay, keep it slow and deliberate.
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With a penis, squeeze the head of the frenulum or head of the penis for about thirty seconds before continuing.
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Stop right before cumming and perform some kegel exercises.
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If using a vibrator, abruptly turn it off.
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Leave the genitals alone and touch elsewhere on the body, such as nipples.
Continue and Repeat!
Now the fun part: do this over and over again! Keep it intentional and keep continued with yourself and your lover if edging with a partner. Some people like to visualize their orgasmic energy flowing from their bits to their head, grazing their fingers or having their partners move their fingers up along the front of their body. Use the cool-down moments to connect with yourself or your partner. Put a hand over a heart to feel how hard it’s beating, kiss, breath, talk dirty to each other. Focus on the balance and control! Remember, edging can last as long (or as short) as you want it to. When you do finally cum, it can be incredibly powerful but for some the orgasm feel underwhelming. Don’t feel defeated, practice makes perfect!
Stop Cumming With These Sex Toys
Now the fun part, sex toys! Sex toys enhance edging more than simple fingers so let’s explore some of our favorite toys that are great for bringing your to the brink.
Strokers And Masturbators
Strokers like the Tenga Flip Zero Gravity are great for edging. Use just the textured opening to rub against and tease your shaft. When you’re ready to cum, penetrate all the way and let this toy milk you out! The Hot Octopuss Pulse Solo is a penis vibrator that focuses on different types of vibration on the frenulum. The Boundless Vibrating Stroker is great for FTM and trans masc guys looking to be edged into oblivion.
Wand Vibrators
The Magic Wand is big, rumbly and relentless! This vibe is simple to use on the clit or perineum and has an easy-to-find on/off button which is great for ruining an orgasm. Another popular option with a more comfortable grip and phone compatibility is the Lovense Domi Wand Vibe.
Air Stimulation Play
Get mean with air pressure vibrators! The Lovense Tenera 2 is great for clits or nipples and is app-controllable! There’s also the Arcwave Ion Pleasure Air Masturbator if you’ve been curious about air-pressure vibes and have a penis
Finger Vibes
For precise edging magic, incorporate the Dame Fin Finger Vibe or the Blush Aria Erotic AF when jerking off your loved one!
Serums and Gels
No shade to biology—but sometimes your bits just need a little help slowing down. The Promescent Delay Spray or Wipes work well and offer a body-safe slightly numbing sensation.
Get Your Own Denial Toolkit
Ready to edge your way into next week? Explore the full collection of edging sex toys here and build your own denial toolkit.
Trust us—your orgasms will thank you. Eventually.